SGT Slaughter in the making...

I'd like to think that over the last few years, I've mellowed out and dropped a lot of my anger issues. I let things slide, and just try to enjoy the good things. But I still have some anger issues, and sometimes they bubble up into a period of fucktastic rage. So let me share with you a short list of people or groups that I'd like to kill, maim, slaughter, beat, bludgeon or, at the very least, scream at and belittle so badly that they cry.

Let's start with Sniper fucking Hill. This so call "internet provider" is by far the worst fucking corporation alive. It would never survive anywhere but a third world country.  They only seem to work while everyone is AT FUCKING WORK. Their "service" ceases to work the instant I want to call home, check my email, or use said "service" in any way shape or form. I get slow ass connections for the meager price of $110.00 a month, in which I might 5 actual hours of usage over the course of the 30 day period.  Way to go, Sniper Hill. If it wasn't such a pain to continue to run my own internet, I wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire. If I didn't HATE this country so much, I'd start up my own service just to put you out of business. I would personally like to hit everyone of you with an up-armored HUMVEE.

Then there's the Master Sergeant who think our whole mission here revolves around what he does, which is making sure convoys are ready to roll out. Hey, MSG, sorry to tell you, but that isn't the entirety of my job. I have other things to do other than dance to your every fucking whim. And don't ask me for my professional opinion on a matter, then completely ignore it. Stop jerking yourself off and get out of my office before I hit you with this sledge hammer.

And to the annoying bitch at the gym who has the goddamn audacity to complain that I'm sweating to much, and that some of it's getting on her, and could I please change to a different treadmill? FUCK YOU, I was here first. I don't care what fucking rank you are, you can kiss my sweaty ass.  If it bothers you so goddamn much, YOU fucking move. Or better yet, go run outside. I'll even chase you with a truck as motivation.

Or how about them fucking Hadji's? It's bad enough that I have to be in their god-forsaken country, where their favorite past-time is to launch mortars at us in the middle of the night so that we have to sit in a bunker for three hours.  But the icing on the Hadji cake is that the crew who is SUPPOSED to be cleaning our latrines and shower trailers (they get paid pretty fucking well for it), are instead taking showers in MY GODDAMN SHOWER TRAILER! They close it off, and it stays closed for an hour and a half while they clean it, and then fucking shower in it! And they only seem to do this when I actually need to take a shower. No matter what time of day, when I go to take a shower, those dirty fucking ass-hats have the shower closed off so that they can take a fucking shower and groom themselves. Not that you can tell, because they stink regardless. Take a fucking shower at home. If you don't have running water, save up for a pump. We're not paying you top use our facilities. It's like working at a store, and taking home the merchandise, simply because you work there. It's fucking stealing. It doesn't help that we're already on water rations.  Stop using my fucking shower, or I'll find where you live and burn it down. I'm just saying.

Or how about the transportation company who can't do there own fucking job. It's because of them that I have to get up and 4 AM every morning, to go inspect their convoys. And every time, it's the same goddamn issues. How many times do you need me to tell you that your shit is fucked up? How many times do I have to re-inspect your shit. It's the same process every time, it's not like I'm surprising these idiots with new standards. But these fistful of fucktards can't seem to pull their head out of there ass. So to this special group of window lickers; learn to do your job before I chain you to the back of your trucks and drag you across the desert.

And to my roommate. I don't really have an issue, but sometimes you frustrate the fuck out of me. I'm the one who keeps the room clean, I'm usually the one who picks up food for us, I cook dinner, take out the trash, and usually do the dishes.  Normally, this doesn't bother me. You throw down money for food, and if asked, you'll do the dishes or take out the trash. But, I have to tell you, when you fill the dirty bowls full of soapy water and then perch them precariously on the edge of the table or desk, so that the slightest bump or tremor causes them to topple over, spilling dirty dish water all over the place (including me, right after I had taken a shower), is NOT doing the dishes. I am not amused.

Maybe I'm over-reacting. Maybe I've just been here too long, and with the end so close in sight, it seems like time drags.  Or maybe I really need a fifth of whiskey and some ass... but the truly sad thing is, all this was my day today, and so far, this has been the BEST day of the week.  So maybe I am over-reacting, but you know what?  Fuck you.